Being human

There are a lot of things that are hard about being human. Life is messy. Sometimes it’s hard. And at times it just sucks. I think that the hardest thing about being human is emotions. Emotions are powerful! They can be debilitating. Sometimes they can’t be contained. Now before I go any further I will acknowledge that there are plenty of good, positive emotions that arty the same attributes as the bad ones. For example, pure joy can overflow and cause tears of happiness. But there are also plenty of “negative” emotions that are just as strong, if not stronger. One of these is anger. It can be ugly. It will control the mind and the tongue, causing thoughts and words that are not truly reflective of the person speaking them. Sadness, hurt, pain and loneliness kind of all wrap up into one big pile of messiness that can weigh down and smother ones spirit. I think that one of the hardest feelings I have dealing with is when someone I love is experiencing sadness or pain. This feeling should really have a name of its own. I have learned how to cope with (perhaps not in the best way) my own emotions…but for me to watch someone I love suffer through anger or sadness is nearly overwhelming. But the flip side is even sweeter too. The joy of watching someone you love be at peace and filled with their own joy is amazing (sorry that word is so overused). So I’m not really sure what my point is (if there is one at all) Exocet that I am truly fascinated with the ability to feel things the way we do as humans. It makes me wonder how Jesus dealt with his array of emotions while he was human. The Bible talks about his anger. And sorrow. And grief. And yet we know he never once sinned even as he dealt with those emotions. I’m fascinated by his mind and his thoughts. And it brings me comfort to know that since he did walk the earth as a human that he felt the same things I do. He understand my prayers when I ask for help dealing with my human emotions.

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Spirit Lead Me

Recently I heard the song “Ocean” by Hillsong United. There is a line in the bridge of this song that has resonated with me so deeply. It has been playing in my mind since I heard it. The words are “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders…” It’s one of those lines that as a writer myself I wish I had written. The image conveyed by these words is so powerful and meaningful to me. But I think that’s really just one reason that the words have been with me for days.

I earnestly believe that God reveals things to us as He feels we are ready for them or as He sees that we need them. Most mornings, before I jump into my daily walk in the word, I pray and thank God for His blessings, and I ask for guidance and wisdom as I open His word. For the past several mornings I have found myself reading and studying in the Holy Spirit. I believe that I personally do not rely nearly enough on the Spirit in my every day life. I know what the Bible says about the Spirit in us, but in my day to day life I’m not sure that I allow it to work in me. But I continue to study and grow in that aspect of my Christian walk. I think that just the words “Spirit lead me…” really spoke to me. I can’t ask the Spirit to follow me…or tell the Spirit which way I would like things to go…or guide myself. It has to be “Spirit lead me.” That is God’s plan. His perfect plan. He sent us the Spirit to dwell in us. Somehow it’s very comforting to think that if I honestly allow that to happen in my life then I don’t have to be the one trying to find my way, because I have the Spirit to lead. We are told in Romans 5 that the Spirit will also fill our hearts with love. The Holy Spirit we are told will also help us in our weakness, and plead for us in accordance with God’s will. (Romans 8).the power of the Spirit is best exemplified in the following verse from Galatians. “…the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” What an amazing God we serve who loved us so much that He sent his son to die for us while we were still sinners…and then He blessed us with the Spirit to keep us In his care. I know that I have barely tapped into fully understanding what a gift the Holy Spirit is, but I do know that I will continue to study and learn and to follow the Spirit’s lead.

The second part of this beautiful phrase is probably my favorite but of figurative language ever. Trust is difficult for many of us. Very few people could honestly say that they trust anything or anyone completely, fully without reservation. But even if we did speak of that kind of trust, there is something about the image of “without borders”. Picture that…endless, infinite, open, ongoing, without borders. Nothing restraining or confining it. That is such a beautiful picture of what trust should be. I love the thought of trusting without borders when it comes to people.. Unfortunately there are very few people out there in our Iives that we could truly say that about. I am so blessed to have a husband in whom I can put that kind of trust. It is such a feeling of peace and contentment to trust without borders in the mate that God chose for me. And as much of a blessing that that is, trusting God without borders is even more of a blessing. God has a plan for my life and though sometimes I try to control it (okay…even obsess) I trust in His word and His plan for my life. He proves His love for us in endless ways every day of our lives. He gave us the Holy Spirit to guide us in each stage of His plan. Our part of the deal is that we allow ourselves to be led and that we trust in our God as He provides for us. But not with the kind of trust that we as mere humans are only capable of…but with the kind of trust that the Holy Spirit can instill in us. Trust without borders.

By the way, the rest of this song is beautiful in its language, imagery and message. I thank God for revealing those words to me in His timing, and I pray that I will keep them with me and allow them to remind me echo day that the God I serve loves me…without borders.