“I know the plans I have for you…”

The house is completely dark and quiet this morning as I sit and reflect. Recently I have been battling challenges and adversities – mostly within myself. I do my best to be a positive, happy person…but sometimes I fail miserably. Lately, this has been the case. I feel like I have been bombarded with one thing after the next just trying to with test my will, or topple me. Through the difficulties, I will have a few bright moments when I can calm myself and remind myself that God – the creator of the universe – is truly in control of my life…I just have to let Him lead. During these shining moments, I am at peace and can just let go and let God. The problem is that I don’t allow those feelings of peace last. Yes…I’m a control freak…not only do I feel the need to control the moment…I’d be happy if I could control the next – say 20 years. And yet I know that each and every time I get in the way of myself and try to lead, I fail miserably, end up worried, upset and in a pretty deep state of depression. I spent a lot of time over these last few days truly listening to God and trying to just be in His presence. He wants me to count the abundance of blessings He has given me. He truly has plans for me – I just keep getting in the way. Big plans. God gave me a wonderful person to journey with…a person who loves God, loves me unconditionally, has a heart for those who are hurting, and has an amazing talent with which to share God’s message and His love. I can’t imagine my life now without Brian Suman. God knew that Brian and I would be able to do great things for Him together. God gave me a mission field of children to teach and to nurture every day. God gave me two awesome children of my own. God gave me the desire and the drive to write music that will share His good news and His love. He has chosen me – ME! – unworthy me, to minister to others through music. As I type I am humbled to see just a small number of the blessings God has covered me with. I am in awe of His love for me. I am comforted by the fact that I know He has a plan for me and for my life…and that the challenges that I face are blessings too! God is making me stronger through adversity. The sunrise is beautiful this morning…yet another gift from God. My prayer for today is that I will not dwell on the small challenges of my own life, but that I will go out today and be thankful for the abundant life God has granted me…and that I may be a blessing to someone else.

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6 comments on ““I know the plans I have for you…”

  1. Sandra Stidham says:

    Wonderful Post, Julie!

  2. Brian Suman says:

    God does have amazing plans for you and you are taking every challenge that He has given you with great spirit. You are a such a fighter and I believe this is one of your best posts yet.

  3. Jules Smith says:

    Thanks Brian…I am thankful everyday for all of your support and love.

  4. Hi there. I came across this post as a recommendation in a post I was writing. So I decided to check it out. This is good stuff because its honest and unfiltered. I don’t know how long you labored over this but I can tell you feel better by thinking and writing on this subject. Keep it up!

    • Jules Smith says:

      I am glad that you took the time to read. I have always found great comfort in writing as a way to really deal with my emotions. I wrote this blog one morning before anyone else was stirring in the house…in about 15 minutes. I had finished praying and it was just on my heart. I always feel better getting my thoughts out…more for me than anyone else.

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